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Category Archives: Mourning into Joy

Unable to Stand, but Still Loved

One moment I was a mother of four, juggling everything while my husband was deployed. I was tired but capable. TheView full post »

9 Years Missing Him

Joshua, It has been almost a decade since you were with me. They told me it would get easier, and it does. I haveView full post »

Going Home

God has said few things to me. I can count them on a hand or two. We have walked closely I think, except for thoseView full post »

When your wheelchair is called Karma

I do not have a theology of suffering. No I don’t. It is not that I don’t need one, it is that I need toView full post »

When My Legs Stopped Working

The internet says you’re supposed to have a message to share, a lesson learned, or a moral to the story. IView full post »

For the One Person Who Reads This and Is Grieving Alone Today…

It is almost summer and the sun is shining. This is not the time to write about grief, but in California the sun isView full post »

What To Do If Mother’s Day at Church Left You Hurting

Did your newly grieving or waiting mama heart brave all the happy families this Mother’s Day? Or did pain fromView full post »

Grace Like Scarlett for a Mama’s Broken Heart

As I kneel in the woods, there are spots of blood. It is happening all over again. I had been running into thisView full post »

If and When

There’s not a way to kiss when you’re afraid it might be the last time. There’s no way to tie it allView full post »

Eight years missing him

It has been eight years missing my son born still and all too quiet on his due date. Almost fourteen years have provedView full post »

For all the posts I never wrote about my first daughter

This is the post for all the posts I never wrote about you. My other daughter. My Blessing. You spent the majority ofView full post »

When you’ve lost too much to do the normal things…

When you have lost, and lost, and lost again – you can’t do normal things that others do without aView full post »

Silenced

There are many reasons for the silence. Many reasons not to open my mouth. Noise, noise, noise all day long, but I fallView full post »

Guest Posting – When Mother’s Day Looks Like Empty Arms

For every woman with empty arms and an aching heart in this season, I pray that she will feel a weeping Jesus near andView full post »

Supermoon

Daughter, The moon travelled close to meet your arrival. It loomed larger in the sky than any time in the past eightyView full post »

Guest Posting – Navigating Grief as Life Moves Forward

The wound remains. Time has passed, is passing still, and I hold our long, awaited baby. The pain of the full-termView full post »

Finally Home

She feels so light in my arms. What if I cannot hold on to her? We buckle her into the carseat that is supposedView full post »

First Days

These first days after birth melt one into another, a beautiful fog. She was born at 12:38pm. Tonight I don’t haveView full post »

The Future…

The only place I marched today was to the grocery store and back home for my son’s thirteenth birthday party. But IView full post »

Worth it

For six years I have wondered if it’s cruel to put them through it all over again. When we began talkingView full post »

Joy – a birth story

This time my breath is calm and my hair brushed. I could have turned and walked back out, this is no middle ofView full post »

Seven Years Missing Him

It’s been seven years, and this time I’m not surprised, by the anniversary, by the march of time. LosingView full post »

Joy Rising

Sometimes I wake up and feel the stillness, I wonder if I’m empty again. I wait, trying just to breath whenView full post »

Silent Night

I have been quiet lately. I have still taught my children, talked to acquaintances, worked, laughed and argued with myView full post »